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Blades of Glory: (Theodore Shapiro) Despite his
occasional hits, it's difficult to understand why Will Ferrell is
considered so funny. Perhaps it's not the fault of the man, but rather
the crew with which he usually finds himself surrounded. Such was the
case with the directorial debut of Josh Gordon and Will Speck in 2007
with
Blades of Glory, a reunion of "Saturday Night Live" veterans
that made its parody of the sports genre so ridiculous that it ceased
being funny after just a few minutes. Essentially the ice skating
equivalent to
Talladega Nights,
Blades of Glory is little
more than MTV's attempt to cash in on yet another variation of the
Ferrell box office phenomenon, with low brow humor and terrible special
effects that render the movie painful to tolerate. Ferrell and
Napoleon Dynamite star Jon Heder play two world-class figure
skaters of completely opposite personalities, Ferrell a wild sex addict
and Heder the effeminate, more refined type. The two get into a fight
when accepting medals after a competition and are barred from the
fictional stand-in for the Olympics. With the help of Craig T. Nelson in
a familiar role, the two skaters train together to bypass the rules of
the sport by skating in a same-sex pair, allowing them to not only
perform maneuvers on the ice not achieved before, but also infuse a
level of homosexual undertones to take over where
The Cutting
Edge left off. There are other skaters are the villains and kidnap
and injure the pair, but to no avail, of course. There's something
unsavory about seeing a movie like
Blades of Glory gross almost
three times its budget, begging ongoing questions about the intelligence
of the American gene pool. Not daunted by any of this stupidity was
composer Theodore Shapiro, who was already well into a solid career as a
parody expert by the time
Blades of Glory came sliding his way.
Like many of his contemporaries in the comedy genre in the 2000's,
Shapiro is a musical chameleon who has never had a chance to establish
his own style of writing because he's made too many paychecks emulating
the styles of others. His music is typically quite effective, applying
contemporary and orchestral tones much like Christopher Lennertz, Mark
Mothersbaugh, and others. The majority of his best known assignments at
the time were heavier on the pop-inspired side, better equating him with
James L. Venable or George S. Clinton, but as his popular music for
Tropic Thunder confirmed the following year, his capabilities in
terms of handling an orchestra are quite adept.
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As to be expected, Shapiro's handling of
Blades of
Glory will remind you of other scores so often that this particular
entry really has no identity of its own. It's the usual haphazard
collection of ideas collected from urban comedies and sports dramas of
the past thirty years, and a learned film music collector could create a
list of such specific references. Carl Orff fans will even hear a nod in
their direction at the end. The sounds of the ensemble are as diverse as
necessary for the variety of genres poked at by the composer. A standard
orchestral group performs noble sports fanfares inspired by
The
Natural for the fake Olympics, heavy on bright brass colors with a
tingle of broken chords here and there to denote stature. The romance
material is handled with kid gloves, a xylophone attempting a delicate
music box tone. Tapping snares and rigid bass brass passages are
reminiscent of John Williams' moments of serious anticipation. Frenetic
moments for the ensemble recall Danny Elfman zaniness. Touches of
Michael Kamen and Don Davis pop up during the main action cue, "The
Chase." Choral passages are largely generic, highlighted by the first
few minutes of the concluding "Blades of Glory." Most of these sequences
are played seriously, a necessity for any good parody score, but their
orchestration is still light enough that you can tell that it's comedic
at heart. You'll find most of the score's primary and secondary themes
performed, often with exaggerated counterpoint, in these fuller cues.
The score's downside is Shapiro's return to his more familiar
contemporary elements for the mid-section of
Blades of Glory. The
hip, funky performances by Hammond organ and rock band ensemble are
insufferable once again, substandard reminders of an era thankfully
outgrown. The source-like cue "Grublets on Ice!" is a clever imitation
of a Barney the Dinosaur song, but why on earth that selection was
placed in the middle of the album rather than at the end as a bonus
track is confounding. Short cue lengths are once again another detriment
to the album presentation of yet another parody score, the
aforementioned middle snapshots of contemporary funk too shifty to
appreciate even on their own. The romance material in "Snow Cones" is a
noteworthy moment to appreciate, but little argument will be made with
any claim that the "Blades of Glory" finale is clearly the highlight of
the score. Here, Shapiro finally bloats the parody with enough serious
intent to lose the fluffy side of things, treating the drama and
science-fiction aspect of the final performance with an extra dose of
gravity through a layer or two of choir. Overall, the score is spoon-fed
parody of the most basic nature. Its recording is adequate but not
particularly impressive, and its 40 minutes on the score-only album will
pass by without much consequence.
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The insert includes a list of performers, but no extra information
about the score or film.
