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  Re: Reading the book, gaining status, and the messiah complex  
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• Posted by Carlton
• Date: Saturday, July 29, 2006, at 5:52 p.m.
• IP Address:
• In Response to: Admission of my Own Pretentiousness/Is Shyamalan a Pretentious Bastard?? (Timmy B.)

> I have always suspected that I might be easily called pretentious but I could never let myself think much about it.
> That all was before some adjusted medication and new self-discovery.

Hey, Tim, I hope you don't become too dependent on this newfound source of medication. Like Hook, I wish you the best during this journey of self-discovery (I'm not going to call it a recovery), but I am also wary of doctors, who view life in terms of an interminable supply of prescription pills and disorder symptoms. After all, everyone here could probably be diagnosed with one of the conditions found in the latest DSM manual. That being said, it's good to hear that medication, and great doctors (?) have improved your life.

> I realize now that I indeed have acted pretentiously for much of my life, not because of trying to appear important or
> excellent, but from truly *believing* that I was both important and excellent.

Timmy, there is nothing wrong with truly *believing* that you are important (and excellent). I'm tempted to steal a page from Christianity. Every being on this planet is important and excellent in their own way... If you believe and accept this, then you should have a better time being more humble and acting less pretentious.

> In the most recent past years of my life I've started writing a book that I've truly believed could be the most important
> book in human history. Even more recently, though, I've realized that this is indicative of a messiah complex.

Most authors must have delusional feelings of greatness and grandiose, or why else would they attempt to work on subjects that have already been worked on to death? I've never heard of this "Messiah Complex," so you'll have to tell me some more about it. I took an Abnormal Psych class awhile ago, but I didn't have really have a real textbook (only a casebook and an autobiography) because my professor wasn't a big supporter of the DSM approach; he took a more humanistic and empathetic approach...

> Iím not saying that Iím ďcuredĒ of this messiah complex... A grandiose sense of self is a challenge that I think I will
> always faceóbut, this is no reason to give up, of course.

Well, one day you might want to give up on a cure and embrace an "acceptance" of your self. Also, what exactly is this Messiah Complex which you keep mentioning? Is it life- threatening?

> This all is way too personal, I know, but itís the only way I can think of to try to make amends here. I canít imagine
> another way to try to clear up resentment concerning me on this board.

I can think of another way, and, yup, it's related to the "content" of your posts. Anyhow, it's good to read that you have become more comfortable with your "darker nature." It's like you have acquired a higher status on the Scoreboard.

> If you donít know what all the above is about, check the archivesÖ

I don't like reading my old post because when I write long (and fast) messages, I tend to gloss over writing errors and they make hard it hard to understand what I was trying to communicate. Thanks for wading through my old messages.

> Speaking of scores for a change, I really am liking Howardís Lady scoreÖ The only other score Iíve gotten this year has
> been The Da Vinci Code which I like as well. Any recommendations for other recent scores??

I recommend exploring the past. This is what I have been doing. You also might want to check out some of the older classical composers, many of whom must have had thier fare share of "disorders"?


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