: (Christopher Lennertz) Given how
ripe the teenage vampire genre's crown jewel,
,
has become for lampooning, it's surprising that veteran satire writers
and directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer seem to have missed
their opportunity to really impale the idiocy of that franchise with
much skill in
. Then again, the 2010 comedy was
trying to parody a concept that is inherently so laughably juvenile in
its original form that perhaps their task was impossible. Defying as
usual the absolutely horrid critical response that these films often
receive,
made a brief splash at the box office and
has earned about the average gross for past Friedberg/Seltzer comedies
like
. The duo takes
almost all of their characters and plot elements from
, leaving most of the names and general events intact but
incorporating a major gag into each scene. Continuing his collaboration
with Friedberg and Seltzer is composer Christopher Lennertz, whose
career has thankfully crept further into the mainstream after producing
impressive music in relative obscurity over the better part of the
2000's. Emerging from his toils with television series and video games
is a budding feature film career defined by comedy music for (sometimes
very fiscally successful) titles like
as part of a busy 2010
summer season for the composer. His music for
in 2008 is a guilty pleasure of the highest order, a work that continues
to impress in its clever pokes at the topic's established sound. As
always, the point of satirical scores like
is to play the film as if it was completely
serious, therefore advancing the effectiveness of each joke. This opens
worlds of opportunity for any composer, allowing genre stereotypes in
music to be exploited in all their glory without any worry of plagiarism
lawsuits. Additionally, by bloating the genre's sound to nearly
overblown proportions, an entertaining listening experience on album can
also result. Such is the case with
once again,
another score that requires you to turn off your brain to appreciate the
fact that it's arguably more effective than the actual scores for
. Whereas the rotating composers for those films have
never been able to truly nail down the musical identity of the
franchise, Lennertz does it for them with ease.
It didn't take an abundance of intellectual thought to
accomplish this pinnacle of music for the concept, but then again, the
franchise and its target audience aren't that musically sophisticated to
begin with. But with creative attentiveness to audience expectations,
Lennertz really did manage to write the best
Twilight score for
those who would appreciate it the most. It takes the contemporary,
electric-guitar tones of Carter Burwell's original, incorporates the
piano lyricism of Alexandre Desplat's sequel, and wraps them in the
morbidly orchestral environment of Howard Shore's entry. Its constructs
and instrumentation are wickedly appropriate for the topic, and much of
this material could be tracked into the real thing without much audience
unrest. It does have a downside, however, and it relates to an
underpowered sound of the Hungarian orchestral players (especially
compared to Debbie Wiseman's all-time favorite vampire spoof score,
Lesbian Vampire Killers) and the need for dissonant stingers all
the time to accompany sudden punch lines and funny shocks. Despite the
deficiencies relating to the ensemble's depth, Lennertz and his crew do
a good job of orchestrating the score and spreading its various sounds
well enough in the mix to give the final result satisfying texture and
attention to detail. The piano is in the forefront (as with Desplat) and
electric guitar is used as a sound effect much like in
Meet the
Spartans. Little electronic whisps, xylophone, and cymbals join the
ultra-cliche female vocalist in conveying a sense of wonder and fantasy.
Acoustic guitar, contemporary percussive loops, enhanced electric bass,
and lighter electric guitar performances lend a sense of coolness to the
score. Solo string elements, seemingly electric at times, give the
atmosphere a sense of demonic influence. Banging chimes and expansive
brass represent the finality of young "Becca"'s choices. The thematic
identities in
Vampires Suck are dominated by its primary idea
(presumably for Becca), stated early and often in many different guises.
It receives fully symphonic force right off the bat in "What Would You
Do?" and is reprised with even more gravity in "Becca Meets the Family"
and "I'm a Killer." In the second half of the latter cue and in "First
Kiss," "The Breakup," "Frank Comforts Becca," and "The Final Bite,"
Lennertz boils the theme down to solo piano backed by lush strings,
guitar, or solo violin. While the expressions of this theme may not be
as technically impressive as Desplat's music for the same concept, they
are more easily digestible. A few secondary thematic elements meander
through the score, led by a massive brass representation of the vampires
in "What Would You Do?," "Race to Prom," and "Edward Exposed" and a
softer idea on piano for Jacob in "Jacob's Crush."
With these ingredients, Lennertz offers a score that
will sound similar to enthusiasts of
Meet the Spartans, but with
its two personalities largely divided between the front and back halves
of the score. After the opening volley of action, Lennertz's lighter
material for character flirtations and contemplations is extremely
attractive, the piano and female vocals both alluring in the most
simplistic sense. A soothingly flowing romantic motif/rhythm inhabits
these early portions, best heard in "Chemistry in Class." The latter
half of "Meet the Sullens," "Chemistry in Class," and parts of "I'm a
Killer" (among others) present the female vocal solos in a manner even
more beautiful that in
Meet the Spartans or
Lesbian Vampire
Killers, taking the eeriness of the later two
Scream scores'
equivalents and putting an Enya-like spin on them. For comedic
melodrama, Lennertz makes the crescendos of harmony in "First Kiss" and
"The Breakup" seem to indicate cataclysmic events. The second half of
the score contains the action, and this is where Lennertz's material
becomes a bit generic and underpowered. Many of these cues would have
sounded great had they been afforded the resounding depth that Wiseman
was able to record for
Lesbian Vampire Killers, because many of
them have to rely upon brute force rather than instrumental colors.
Group choral accents are surprisingly infrequent, especially after being
featured prominently in the opening cue. Still, despite failing to
retain as much interest as the romantic side of the score, the sustained
action and stinger portions are adequate. As to be expected, perhaps,
there are a few nuggets and in-jokes contained in the score that are
worth mentioning. Lennertz references his theme to
Meet the
Spartans (intentionally or not) at about 0:22 into "Something
Strange..." and, far more prominently, he uses "Sleepwalking" as a blatant
parody of John Williams' Hedwig theme from the
Harry Potter
franchise. He spends an entire minute playing with the waltz-set
progressions of the theme before outwardly expressing it on solo violin.
Hints of this idea extend into the opening moments of "I'm a Killer," a
good summary track of all the score's major thematic styles and a likely
candidate to be nominated for an award as the best single cue of 2010.
Also summarizing the score well is the album's conclusion, "The Final
Bite," which leaves you with a whimsical restatement of the title theme
and farewells from the all the pertinent solo elements. Overall,
Lennertz reprises his superior parody skills for
Vampires Suck
and not only adds yet another guilty pleasure to film music collections
(this time on a deserved commercial offering from Lakeshore Records) but
also does what Carter Burwell, Alexandre Desplat, and Howard Shore have
all failed to do: create the perfect sound for
The Twilight Saga.
And it once again proves that today's parody scores definitely don't
suck.
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